Embrace Your Inner Weirdo

Our Kinky Friends Discuss the Beauty of Being Eccentric

By Nicholas Tanek 

I’m not only kinky, but I’m a weirdo. I like weird films. I like bizarre music. I like to eat weird foods. When I was a teenager, I made homemade straight jackets and came in my pants. I enjoyed staring into space for long periods of time and made bizarre noises for fun. I didn’t even understand it. Even before I did drugs, I loved absurd humor. One of my favorite sketches was “The Pear Dream” from The Kids in The Hall. When Adult Swim came along, I felt like there was a whole bunch of people who understood me… even though I didn’t always understand their work.

I don’t try to be weird. (Okay…sometimes I do when I’m hanging out with my other weird friends to make them laugh.) My point is my eccentric behavior is deeply ingrained in me. I think it is a mixture of OCD, my addiction issues, my love of psychedelic culture, and my love of the creative arts. After all this time, I am comfortable being this weirdo and I don’t care what “normal” people think of my weirdness.

Being a part of the kink community, I’ve met some wonderful and weird people who embrace their eccentricities. So I asked them a couple of questions about being weird, feeling weird, and embracing their weirdness.  Here are their answers.


 Ami Mercury

Ami Mercury is a model, writer, and creator of the upcoming novel and art project, Orc Girl. She considers herself a nerdy goth girl who is very kinky.  As a professional fetish model and cam girl, she has done various kinky videos that include dressing up as a clown, wearing diapers, and being a strict Mommy.

Twitter: https://twitter.com/AmiMercury

Tumblr: http://theamimercury.tumblr.com/

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OrcGirl

MyFetishLive: http://myfetishlive.com/AmiMercury

What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

At the risk of sounding like a kink cliché, the first few years of my education were at a Catholic school. I HATED wearing uniforms. I hated looking the same as everyone else.

Once a month, however, we would have one day where we were allowed to wear whatever we wanted. Happily, I pulled from the closet a cowgirl outfit (complete with boots, a faux “buffalo skin” vest, and handkerchief scarf). The kids all erupted into laughter. I was teased relentlessly the whole day.

To be fair, being picked on by my classmates was not an unusual occurrence. It was always for ambiguous things. They told me I was weird, strange, gross, but it was nothing concrete. This was the first time they had something tangible to point out my unfortunate “weirdness.” They’d picked on me. They made me feel different, but until that point, I’d never realized that I actually WAS different. Through no fault of my own, of course. I wasn’t going out of my way to be different, I was just doing what seemed natural to me at the time.

Later in my 6th year, I expressed my visceral disdain when the Beast, from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast, turned into a prince in the end. “So what if he looked different? Isn’t what’s inside the most important thing? I thought THAT’S what the story was supposed to be about!”

I guess it would only be fitting that I would ultimately choose an unconventional career. I am a fetish model, cam girl, phone sex counselor, and web-comic artist. Even in those professions, I swing about as far to the unconventional side as you can get. I shoot a variety of fetishes, but primarily adult baby/diaper, clown, and jeans fetish porn. I center my cam show around diaper fetish. My web-comic is a romance about a human girl who falls into a fantasy world, and becomes the personal thrall of an orc king. I personally enjoy diaper and clown fetish in my personal life. I also have a monster fetish, which is what inspired me to write my web-comic, Orc Girl.

Just being kinky is weird enough for some people, let alone the kinks that I have. But overall, I think being weird is somewhat subjective. I’ve had people balk at my clown fetish, but have no problem with the fact that I wear a chain collar around my neck and call my boyfriend “Daddy” as he beats my ass purple with a cane. I’ve met people who shared my love of diapers, but were repulsed by my attraction to monsters. When we get down to it… aren’t all of these things weird by conventional standards?   

When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

My parents realized, early on, that I had a very active imagination, and I think they did their best to help me cultivate that. That being said, this was the south (Kentucky, to be specific). My parents were still God-fearing folk raised on 1960’s traditional family standards. I seem to remember that allowing me to indulge in daydreams was often accompanied by a considerable amount of church-going.

But I think the biggest problem I’ve faced with being weird is just loneliness. Whether you’re a 12-year-old sitting alone at lunch because none of the other kids want to be around you, or you’re a grown adult who fears opening up to people, being weird often means being excluded in some way.

Being weird also comes with people having preconceived notions about who you are as a person. They make their own conclusions about your character that may or may not even be true. (I really wish I got laid as often as some of my enemies claim I do.) I guess being weird earns you a strange notoriety, deserving or otherwise.

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

Well I’ve been able to make a career out of it. Every day, I get to do the weird things I love. But most of all, I think embracing my weirdness helped me learn to love myself. Like I said, being weird is lonely. If you’re going to be spending so much time with yourself, you should at least be someone you like.

Loving yourself, as with loving another, is not a set-it and forget-it solution. It requires maintenance, grooming and care. It’s a lot of hard work, but ultimately rewarding.

When I was about 12 years old I came to my mother and asked her: “Mom, why don’t the other kids like me? Why do they treat me differently?”

To which my mother replied something along the lines of: “Well, the truth is, you are different. The so-called popular kids probably feel like they are different too, they just hide it. So it all comes down to a choice: we can repress who we really are and pretend to be what other people want, or we can be true to ourselves and do what we think is right. The first way is easy, because we won’t be lonely, but hard because we can never relax and be ourselves. The second way is hard because it’s lonely, but easy because at least we’re not pretending. Now that you’re old enough to understand this idea you can make that choice too, but only you can make it.”

And what I said to her, is the same thing I say today: “Well… I guess I choose to be me, then.”



Born and raised in California, Badwolf recently moved to Oklahoma and is bored out of his mind. He is married to a beautiful vanilla mom and hoping to release the inner kink with her one day. He is a foot fetishist and weird stuff makes his day. We became friends in a Facebook group (The Last Absurd Subgroup On The Left) that celebrates absurd humor.


What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

I used to drive around town with random masks that I own and race random people. l would dance to trance music every time I won.  Also, I try to sneak in a mask or two during sex just to freak my wife out.

When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

My weirdness is always getting in the way of my marriage. My kids love it, but my wife seems to think I’m immature. I just say, “I know you are but what am I?” So yeah.

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

I’ve always embraced who I am and my weirdness. “I like big butts and I cannot lie.” If you can’t be who you are, whether you are a weirdo or not, then what are you doing with your life? Embrace your inner weirdo and make friends that like it. If you like getting spanked, find someone who likes spanking… dang it!  Weird is just another word for unique …. allons-y!!!!!


 TheLadyAscends is a very talented artist and pagan love witch who is a good friend of mine. She has multiple subs and participates in many kinky spiritual rituals like fake blood orgies and human sacrifices.

What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

I knew it was going to get weird when I liked it when he had a bowl of severed doll heads and shaving supplies. I was about to turn around out the door when he explained his kink was watching a woman shave them while he masturbated and then swallowed the Barbie heads just as he came. I figured it was a free show. And he swallowed it… like a pelican. It was a wonderfully weird evening, but we broke up the next evening.

When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

My weirdness has never caused problems for me. In my opinion, it just created opportunities to help expand other people’s minds.

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

As an artist and painter, people kind of expect you to be weird. People build up a mythology around you, so the eccentric nature helps sell your art.


YoungScratch is a switch who loves power exchange.  He actually likes all types of BDSM. These days, he has become much more open to expressing himself in kink.

What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

I do a great deal of weird shit aside from my strange assortment of fetishes, which is considerable. There is a core of two factors that fuel my weird behavior. The first is my utter refusal to consider anything about myself private. I happily divulge any information asked of me. The second is that I will, on a whim, fall into different personas; complete with their own voice, mannerisms, opinions, and back story.

When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

My weirdness has caused very few problems. I sometimes have trouble connecting with people when first meeting them. Normal people aren’t sure how to handle my eccentricities and get scared off. My weirdness once contributed to being passed over for a promotion at work. These may sound severe, but I’m happy with my job and my social situation. Neither of these were nearly as important to me as being able to be myself.

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

My complete openness has allowed others to be more open with me. My friends always get a hoot out of different characters and I get a great deal of joy when I see the face of someone who has no idea how to respond to me. The most practical benefit is the immense amount one can get away with if they cultivate the right atmosphere of weird. I’ve done things at work and earlier in school that I should have gotten in a lot of trouble for. The people responsible for doling out the punishment were always either laughing themselves, decided to chalk it up to my eccentricity, or were so blown away by how strange it was that they didn’t know how to respond. But the best part about being weird is that it’s fun. I just enjoy being the weird one, taking on characters for an impromptu performance, dancing like a madman when the music hits me even in public, or belting out Christmas carols in July. Embracing my weirdness has allowed me to be myself.

 Tangled Blue

Tangled Blue is a kitten who is also an artist. She is in a DD/lg (Daddy Dom/little girl) dynamic with her husband of eighteen years.  She is a good friend of mine who is funny, weird, absurd, and sexy.

What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

I jump on my bed at least once daily. I yell at wildlife trying to cross the road to remind them to walk safely. I use a fake accent when ordering at the drive through menu, but use a regular voice when I pick up my food. I’m in a long-term DD/lg relationship and often ask him to buy me a balloon to be my friend while we shop in stores. 

I have friends that are balloons.

I used to shove cheese in outlet sockets when I was little because I believed mice lived in there and they needed to be fed. I like to name my shrimp as I am eating them because it’s like giving them a proper funeral. I rarely wear matching socks, but my bras and panties always match. I usually read at least five books at once and then I reread my favorite bits often. I make tiny works of art and leave them for other people to find. I’m fond of drawing little cats on scraps of paper and tucking them in random places like in the pockets of pants at the mall. Sometimes, there are humans in the pants. 

I dance. EVERYWHERE. I don’t give a damn if it’s the grocery store or the zoo.

I stop often to marvel at the beauty and wonder in this world and remind myself daily of how wonderfully exciting it is to be alive.

When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

It’s hard for me to make friends. I often feel that I am the one that other people talk about in hushed voices and move away from in social situations. I have been likened to a “muppet” and often a target of jokes. I have social anxiety because of this and I don’t fare well in large social events with other adults. I am afraid to talk in large groups socially unless I am in charge of the event. I prefer to be the organizer and buzzing around with purpose over someone trying to hold a conversation with me. I find the joke in everything and have a perverse sense of humor and many people do not understand my take on the world. I often say, “fuck.” My mouth and body act before my brain throws up a red flag. 

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

I am an artist, a writer, and a dreamer. I need my weirdness to keep me creating. I need my weirdness to keep me happy. I am an eternal optimist and find the humor and joy in everything I do. I also love finding people with similar mindsets and we usually end up becoming dear friends… even if they are not a balloon.


And now, for my answers…

Nicholas Tanek

What are some of the things you have done (or still do) that the average person would think is weird?

First and foremost, I’m in the kink community and I don’t care who knows. I’m out! I’ve been put in a French maid outfit with my cock locked in chastity and whipped in front of a bunch of people while locked in medieval stocks in a public dungeon. Regardless of the kinky sex, it’s the day to day stuff that is weird. For example, I will very rarely step on the first or the last step of the staircase when walking up and down the stairs. When I drive over train tracks, I lift my legs up and cross my fingers for good luck. Then, there is my taste in music (Negativeland, Severed Heads, The Boredoms, Ween, Coil, Psychic TV, My Bloody Valentine, etc.). Those bands make weird music. Plus, I love weird shows like 12 Oz. Mouse, Frisky Dingo, The Young Ones, Snuff Box, etc. I think that my love of anything that is good and not mainstream makes me feel empowered. Then, of course, there is weird porn. Even if the specific kink is not my kink, I love weird porn. I’m not into clowns or diapers, but I will watch and support Ami Mercury any day of the week.

 When have your eccentricities and weirdness caused problems for you?

There have been family issues. I wrote The Coolest Way to Kill Yourself and a book about the kink community, Your Kinky Friends. Both books are brutally honest and graphic about sexuality and drug use. For me, they were like therapy. Everyone in my family was like, “I cannot believe you are putting this out there.” My brothers, parents, nieces, and nephews could easily find out that I have experienced hardcore drug use, homemade straight jackets, forced crossdressing, and pegging.

My kinky behavior also caused some vanilla women to back off because they felt they were not kinky enough for me. By being associated with me, they were scared that their family and friends would think that they are some kinky weirdo.

How has embracing your eccentricities and your weirdness benefited you?

I am a proud weirdo. I grew up a punk rock kid who always felt like the outcast. Then, I became a raver kid in the 1990s. I embrace creativity and self-expression. But something bad happened to me. I became a corporate zombie who was in a horrible marriage and obsessed with making money. I felt dead inside. It was kink that made feel alive again. It was kink that made me start writing again. Most of all, writing about my life in an honest way helped me be proud that I am an individual. I’m not like everybody else. My kinky friends are not like everybody else either. I’m proud of that and I’m proud of them.

 What Have We Learned from All This?

 “Normal” is boring. Every person in this article has this beautiful unconventional side that makes them interesting. I love hanging out with these weirdos. You know what? Weirdos have better sex. Weirdos have a better sense of humor. Weirdos are more fun. Embrace your weirdness. Be who you are! You will be a happier person and that will lead to a ripple effect that will make other people be creative and be happier. When you break it down, no one is truly normal. It’s a matter of accepting the parts of yourself that make you different. We are all weirdos and that’s what makes us beautiful. We have the guts to express ourselves. Join us. There’s a very good chance that you’ll have a good time.


Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nicholas.tanek

Twitter: https://twitter.com/NicholasTanek

Buy Your Kinky Friends

Join the YOUR KINKY SEX chat group on Discord:  https://discord.gg/uUwzVVa