#ThriftyKinkThursday: Stick Your Dick in Stuff

by Tangled Blue

Being thrifty is nifty especially when you need some sexy fun time.  This #ThriftyKinkThursday is going to be a little different. We are offering a collection of ideas rather than a scene.  So let’s explore things that you can stick your dick into for fun!

I’m sure for most penis bearers ramming your cock into another person or person shaped object is the preference, but that isn’t always feasible.  I wanted a list that thrifty kinksters could keep in handy just in case they didn’t have a friend or specialized toy to poke.  This would also be a good list for a Domme who wants to give her sweet sissy sub a treat.

  1.  Food

The scene in American Pie where  Jason Biggs sinks balls deep into a warm apple pastry is classic, but there are many other foods that could be fun.  Items such as pudding cups,  hollowed out cucumbers, fruit cocktail, and my favorite, a banana peel could offer a wide variety of sensations. I would love to watch a dude jerk off with a banana peel.  I think it may be comedy gold. Monkey noises would be required.


  1.  Stuffed Things

I’ve never seen it in action but many young men tell a tale of humping their couches.  The slot between cushions gives just enough pressure to keep things interesting and it’s quiet.  Pillows are also a good buddy for some light experimentation. They have a somewhat body shape and don’t mind being called your “dirty little fluffy whore.”


  1.  Socks

Socks are a popular choice for masturbation fun because they are easy to wash, quiet, and can handle lube.  The fabric can give a nice ribbed sensation. If you add eyes and a mouth, you could make a friend.


  1.  Canisters

There are a slew of DIY pocket pussies on the internet.  Several sites and YouTubers offered a step by step guide for creating a toy that involves cramming sponges inside of a Pringles can and then use a rubber glove and lube for slickness.  Other geniuses use warm baggies of water or toilet paper tubes to simulate a Fleshlight. It’s worth a Google search if you want to try it out. Dig through your recycling bin and you may just have a date for tonight.  


6. Rubber Gloves

Tenga eggs are amazing and a fun toy to add to you collection, but they don’t last very long.  They tear and rip after a few uses. Rubber gloves can be used to feel that extra slick textured feeling without breaking the bank.  Fill a glove with lube and enjoy!  Or slip the glove on and call your hand Donna Reed. Wearing a string of pearls is optional but encouraged. 


  1. A Muddy Hole

Dig a hole.  Get creative.  It could be fun!


  1.  Silky Panties

These are perfect if they belong to someone you love or lust after.  It’s always a good idea to ask permission before using the lingerie of others to stroke down your fine fine shaft.  The feeling of silk is like no other. You feel pampered and luxurious when jerking off in silk. You can always buy you own if you can’t find someone to lend you their unmentionables.  

  1. Chicken Bucket

This was an internet suggestion.  You cut a hole in the bottom of the chicken bucket and then hump it like a rabbit in heat.  I suppose the container is sturdy to hold your weight and has a nice feeling to it. Some suggested to wear a condom when doing this.  It might just work and if it doesn’t…hey…it’s still finger licking good.


  1.  Lotions/Creams/Sauces

This is a no-brainer, but a lubed up hand or container makes for a better playmate. Experiment with different kinds of liquids and mixtures to find one that has a viscosity that you enjoy.  Avoid things with exfoliates, mint, acids, or things like Icy-Hot. They can potentially harm your penis.  Nobody wants to explain that they have a rash on their main member because they were jerkin the gherkin with hot sauce. (Vaseline keeps your skin soft.)

  1.  Spit on your Hand

It’s classic.  It’s free. It always does a good job.

Have fun!  Be kinky! Be safe!  

5 thoughts on “#ThriftyKinkThursday: Stick Your Dick in Stuff”

  1. Im 50yrs and had a panty fetish since 9yrs. Feel free to ask me about it. When how with who it all started if ive been caught. etc

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