Mischief Manor: Real Random Quotes

Conversations with kinky people inspire us. Since the opening night in 2022, I began collecting real random quotes that I overhear in passing while at Mischief Manor, my local BDSM kink dungeon run by the legendary Mistress Schari.  The rule of the game is that people must consent to contribute these quotes. Second, they are actual quotes that must be random, but in passing. The third rule is never to attribute a quote to a person. Part of the fun is remembering who said it (or who you think would have said it).

“I want weird people to meet other weird people.”

“I think I have the solution for world peace.”

“Do me a solid and chew before your food before you tell me your story about puppy play.”

“What’s wrong with you, really?”
“That’s beautiful. My life is crazy.”
“Oh, I’ve had interesting experiences.”
“You can’t throw a whip at 99% of the time in a New York City party. Not like here.”
“This is the fun part….. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
“You can stab me.”
“No one lets me use my needles on them.”
“Maybe I want that. You don’t know me.”
“My head was twitching like an owl.”
“This hurt… in a good way.”
“This is getting very personal. “

“I’ll Bottom for anything.”

“I forgot my machete. Maybe it was on purpose”
“The tassel and that guy? A big thumbs up.”
“I’m sorry we never met before the last time we ran into each other.”
“That’s what happens when you leave your electric play foot pedals lying around.”
“He’s comfortable so he is fine.”
“You can tell a lot by a man by his tie”

“Don’t unzip your dress, just text me a picture.”

“Do you remember who the keyholder is to your chastity device?

“There is a lot of neurodiversity in the scene”

“Find your happy and do that”

“Take me now…. I’m kidding.
… or am I?”

“So, he ends up in my DMs”

“I started a war with the government of my town.”

“This will make a good quote.”

“Did you ever buy yourself a new vibrator?”
“No, I just plugged mine back in.”

“I’m cumming tomorrow “

“I work in law so I don’t have any emotion.”

“I was too much of a pothead to remember that”

“They are all covered in grease”

“Did you say you are moving to Kosovo?”

“Please…. Please… please let me worship your pussy.”

“My cross is being built”

“Ow!!!!! Three!”

“Whatever kink you have walking in the door, you are leaving with a different one.”

“I think I might be kinky”

“Thirteen!!!! Oh, shit!”

“I am in a dungeon looking up sodomy laws on Wikipedia…. for fun”

“Hit her with your boobies”

“It’s cool. I’m a dog person….. oh, I’m a dog person.”

“Silence is golden and duct tape is silver”

“Ahhhh FORTY SEVEN”

“Are you going to beat her with a rubber chicken now?”

“There are like 5 different rubber chickens in here.”

“I have so many questions on my mind “

“Tickle torture? It’s great! So much laughter!”

“That’s why I never go into the pool at a sex convention “

“The chicken is broken”

“I gotta go for the calorie burn”

“To be a very high-level attorney, you have to be weird “

“Fuck! Ninety-Nine!”

Sissy Charm School:

“Keep your boobs on!”

“Inside out, pop it up”
“If you are going to make me wear this, I’m going to make it work for me”
“A bra is not comfortable. It was not meant to be comfortable. We are defying gravity”
“Do you know what The Lipstick Index is?”
“Do not put Lycra in a dryer”
“Buy Dr.  Scholl’s foot double air pillow for your shoes.”
“Work with the colors”
“It’s one thing to live your fantasy… it’s another thing to have someone witness it.”
“Save the water”
“Are you playing basketball? No? Then you don’t need a sports bra.”
“It’s weird, Nick.”
“He’s got a vagina… and I can fuck it if I want to.”

“Who hasn’t had cum in their hair?”

“I’ve had 10 women who have pegged me. Everyone is different.”
“Being a whore is fine.  Consent is what is important.”
“My summer color is noir.”
“You are more confident than you think you are, you schmuck.”
“I have planned many a husband’s death with my friends”
Fridays & Saturdays:
“I’m more than willing to choke you anytime.”
“I got paid $300 dollars from someone to massage my feet while he wears a dress.”
“Occasionally…  I have to peg a fat ass.”
“If you are using rope and fold someone in half, someone is going to fart.”
“I can climb him like a tree.”

“Even if you play with a remote control butt plug, you have to remember to use it.”

 

“I’m cold and my shirt has cum on it.”

 

“Shall I bring in the black bag, just for giggles?”

 

“Look at the fun toys I have! You never know what you’re gonna need.”

 

“I took my butt plug out…. that seems like a good idea before pizza.”

 

“I don’t care if I pee on your table, but you might “

 

“He wanted me to wear boots and a t-shirt, like something to paint the house. I thought that was an odd request “
“He’s just panicking because of the crossbow”
“Sugars and vaginas are not a good mix.”

“You must be whimsical. I’m serious”

 

“Someone dropped something and I immediately wondered, “Was that a spoon?”
(while giving a nod to Nicholas and Sunshine)

 

“Breasticles”

“I am a working Dominatrix tonight.”
“Look at that smile. I love it! It makes it all worth it.”
“Eyelashes make a huge difference.”

“It’s definitely NOT Scientology.”

“I did his podcast and now look at us.”

“I am hypnotizing you with this ball bag.”

“So many rope tops are egotistical, but she ropes for the bottom. She ties for the bottom, not the audience.”

“When the needle punctures the skin, I am reminded of the feeling of finally getting a sip of cold water after being around nothing but heat.”

“I should put the ball bag back.”

“You can do knife play with this!”

“I love needles!”

“What isn’t she allowed to tell you?”

“Did I tell you how much I love needles?”

“Apricot Jucytits and Reginald Meatpuppet”

“I have a plethora of terrible things.”
“I don’t have nerve endings in my petticoat.”
“ I believe Ballin I love you do you know we’re trying to please each other”
“I mean he went exploring for the first time with us… exploring abandoned buildings.”
“Most people do not like to be set on fire. Well, some people do.”
“One day I was submissive and then, a Domme handed me a flogger…”
“You know that there is a running joke that you are going to fuck him to death.”
“I called her Frodo. How can you be a Pro Domme and not wear shoes?”

“You gotta a bigger one?”

“We make sure people don’t get hit on the backswing.”

“Is that your car parked at _____? Your lights are on.”

“The piss virgins are the best.”

“They were a little depraved… a little.”

“I’ll be be right there. I just have to tie up these loose ends…. That’s not what I mean.”

“What would happen if werewolves were on the moon?… think about it.”

“Serenity now, sanity later.”
“Fetch! Fetch! Fetch!”
“What song is this? I cannot hear it through the moans and screams.”
“Warm me up and wind me down”
“Is that a duck?”
“Will the handlers get into a circle?”
“We will see if this position works for you.”
“We bring the funk to your ass and you love it.”
“Where the fuck are my keys?”
“The duck bag is broken.”
“Let’s go. I peed.”

“I walked into a weird sentence.”

“It was the best scene all night. Sitting on that couch I could see your scene, and it was like a work of art.”

“You’re done? You sure about that?”

P.s. I know this YKF post is a huge mess, but I am going to the hospital tomorrow. With the liver transplant and all I have been through, I wanted to capture the whimsical weird beauty of Mischief Manor by posting this now. You know me. I’m all about capturing the moment.   Thank you Mistress Schari & Catnip_boi. You are legends in the kink community who have created a safe and fun place where one can be themselves in a safe, sane, legal, and consensual way.  Mischief Manor has saved my life in an infinite amount of ways. A little kinky conversation inspires.  Let’s keep the tradition alive. So, what’s inspiring you these days?

 

Thank you to Mistress Schari, Catnip_boi, SunshineMusic, Cbombz, Sestra, Briska, Blackmessii, and all of our kinky friends at Mischief Manor.

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