Our Kinky ROPE Friends by Nicholas Tanek

 

In the BDSM community, there is a trust and artform that are intertwined when it comes to rope. (I was not trying to make a pun in that last sentence.) What I am trying to say is that there is a beauty in the artwork of the knots and the play. There is also a sensual aspect to a person being bound and their partner wielding the power to tie them. Rope. Rope. Rope. Rope. Rope. I love rope and I love being tied up… and tying people up!  So, I asked my rope-loving rigger friends some questions.

 

Here are their answers…

Mistress Cassie

(Cassie Loves Rope/Sanctuary)

 

Miss Cassie is a Professional/Lifestyle Dominatrix, Rigger/Rope Artist, Performance Artist, Rope Bondage Instructor, BDSM Educator & Fetish Actor/Model.

www.MissCassieLovesRope.com

www.SanctuaryLAX.com

www.DomConLA.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/CassieLovesRope

Tell us how you got started and what you find most attractive about rope bondage.

I was influenced early in the innocence of childhood. We played games of capture and escape. We tied our playmates to chairs, playground equipment, and trees. We were inspired by fairy tales, cartoons, movies, and TV. It was the 60s where children could play more freely, and the culture was morphing in fantastic ways. There was rope in scouts. Then, there were macramé projects with my mother. My family was into boating and water skiing. Seems there has always been rope in my life.

When I became sexually active, like many people, I found the addition of restraints during sex exciting. Needless to say, there was rope involved. In 1992, I met someone who educated me about BDSM and I knew my calling was rope bondage. As a young adult, the appeal of rope bondage was the excitement it added to sex. Over the years, the appeal has transitioned to the artistic application of rope bondage and its structural engineering, a much deeper satisfaction that feeds the intellect and the soul as well as the primal side of the whole being.

What is your favorite knot/tie/harness (etc.)?

My favorite rope bondage structure to tie is Predicament Bondage which involves many knots, ties, harnesses, and imagination. See question 4 for a more detailed description.

How do you deal with aftercare and what advice can you give to those interested in rope play?

Aftercare requires forethought and should be discussed during the initial negotiation for play. Everyone needs aftercare, not just the bottom. Rope bondage is a physical activity and you need to replenish your mind, body, and soul after playing.

My aftercare routine consists of the following:

a) Take care of the bottom!

Untie and end scene with care.

Have the bottom/s sit or lie down until they have their bearings. Make sure they can walk a straight line, see the correct number of fingers, etc.

Give all scene participants water. Hydration is very important. Have them take sips at first. Never guzzle as to avoid an upset stomach or taking water down the wrong pipe.

Make sure equilibrium is restored before allowing bottom to stand; falling can cause injury.

Cover with blanket if needed and do other special aftercare activities as previously discussed.

Recommend food to restore energy. Remember to balance carbs and protein to avoid sugar drop.

I like my scene bottoms to enjoy their subspace.

b) Scene cleanup

Cleaning is a Zen activity for me. It gives me peace of mind that everything is cleaned properly and the time to inspect toys, equipment, and scene props for damage. If the bottom’s vitals have stabilized, I might allow them to participate in scene cleanup if they desire.

 c) Water, food, and rest for myself when the scene is clean and the bottom no longer requires supervision.

Playing with rope and bondage, in general, requires communication and common sense. Communication involves the negotiation, the safe word, and scene protocol for communication as well as observation of non-verbal signals. Common sense for rope bondage means not creating a circulatory issue by tying the bondage too tight, by not putting pressure on delicate vessels and body parts like nerves, trigger points, joints, and single limbs. Never put rope around the neck! Have EMT/Paramedic Safety Scissors on hand to cut the rope if necessary. You can always buy more rope. The life and well-being of your play partner is far more important! It is highly recommended to take rope bondage lessons and training from a qualified source. There are many resources available from publications to online tutorials and hands-on classes in the BDSM community.

Describe your perfect rope play scenario.

As mentioned in the answer to question 2, I love elaborate Predicament Bondage scenes. My favorite scenario is rigging interactive ropes in the erogenous zones of two or more bottoms. Often, I will add partial suspension features to make balance difficult. I like to fully immobilize at least one arm and one leg of each bottom leaving them with only one free arm each. I tie them facing each other and the object of the game is to knock the other bottom off balance. Movement from each bottom does cause stimulation.

Video interview with Miss Cassie (Cassie Loves Rope)

VIDEO CHAT: Miss Cassie (CassieLovesRope / Sanctuary Dungeon) w/ Nicholas Tanek

 Topaz Steele

Topaz Linda Steele is a cosplayer, shibari artist, amateur photographer, artist, and a Domme. She is in Chicago. Her other names are Artemis Sylverwolf or The_Sylver_Lycan. In the BDSM community, her focus is shibari.

https://www.instagram.com/the_sylver_lycan/

Instagram:  https://ko-fi.com/sylverlycan

Tell us how you got started and what you find most attractive about rope bondage.

I was always interested in shibari. One day at a party, I saw my friend @Fundoshijin_sanjou (IG) tying someone up. I asked him to mentor me. He showed me a few ties. From there, I was basically on my own. So, I’m now self-taught.

I find the art of shibari the most attractive. Making sure the ropes are symmetrical, clean and neat. I also find the intimacy of tying someone attractive. None of my sessions are sexual. The intimacy is the conversations that I have with my models/rope bottoms. I have become closer friends with them after the session.

What is your favorite knot/tie/harness (etc.)?

My favorite knot is the double coin knot. It took me a while to learn that starting off. It brings back funny memories of me telling off the rope when I couldn’t get it right lol. My favorite tie is the karada. I think most of my favorites are the first ties that I practiced that brought on frustration. Now, I can do them, look back and feel proud.

How do you deal with aftercare and what advice can you give to those interested in rope play?

Aftercare is a slight massage, a hug, more conversation, and/or a glass of water. I ask what makes them feel comfortable first before the tie to know what to do for their aftercare.

To those interested in rope, I cannot stress this enough… LEARN SAFETY OF ROPE FIRST! Remember the guidelines of safety like you remember your social security number.

Describe your perfect rope play scenario.

It’s funny. I don’t have a perfect rope play scenario. I would love a flexible rope bottom who will let me rig them to a tree in a split. Mainly, a perfect rope session to me is my rope bottom being open-minded to different ties. I love clean, symmetrical lines, great lighting for the photography of my session, and a hug for aftercare.

Video interview with Topaz Steele

VIDEO CHAT: Topaz Steele with Nicholas Tanek

Sin

Sin is an international SM kinbaku performer, practicing BDSM and rope bondage from 1987-2001. After a 10-year absence and having business interests in Japan, he took up a fascination with kinbaku. He studied with Shigonawabingo san and Yukimura Haruki san in Tokyo. He performs regularly at events in Europe, North America, and Japan. He avoids photography and video since he prefers to remain underground. His style is kan’nōnawa (官能縄)  aka “sensual/erotic/carnal rope.”

His history in rope bondage from the mid-1980s to around 2015 is captured in the book Year of The Bakushi: http://amazon.com/Year-Bakushi-Sin/dp/1537389122/

SMpedia: http://smpedia.com/index.php?title=Sin(%E8%8B%B1%E5%9B%BD)

He also writes for Kinbaku Today and Darkside Magazine. He is currently in the editing stage of a new book focused on the psychology of BDSM and rope bondage expected to launch in 2019.

Tell us how you got started and what you find most attractive about rope bondage.

Around 1987, my first wife explained that she wanted to ‘play’ in the bedroom. Having grown up in the Boy Scouts and sailing, we used to enhance our play by me tying her up, occasionally suspending (although we didn’t think of this at the time). We found restraint in rope increased our libido and magnified the enjoyment of our erotic relationship. There was no scene. Nobody knew what we were doing in secret, and we worked very hard to keep our pleasure private.

We split in the 1990s. By chance, I entered a relationship with a Japanese lady who also turned out to be kinky. As I was traveling often to Japan on business, I fell into the world of BDSM, including rope bondage. I began making friendships and tying up people in bars for fun. I still had no idea there was any scene outside of Japan and met very few westerners.

In 2000, I relocated to Germany. After a while, I attended a kink event. I was so surprised to find somebody else tying. He explained he was a “rigger.” I’d never heard the term in Japan. There was a burgeoning community in the west. I tried to join in, but I suppose because of the strange route I’d come, I didn’t fit in with the world of aesthetic tying, rope-centric events, or the copying and cloning of the form and structure of others. So, I opted to continue on my own path, enjoying the company of like-minded friends in an underground scene in Japan, and just getting on with it, enjoying tying as a part of the adventure of sado-eroticism.

Rope is only a tool and the players involved the prime factor. As a tool, what I love most about rope is the versatility. It provides so many possibilities to suit our lascivious desires. If the lady being pleasured is not so masochistic, preferring dominance, I can use it stealthily; tracing it over her flesh; drawing it like a snake to envelop her; slowly constricting until she is mine. If it’s eroticism she demands, I can use it to vibrate, from the Mons to the anus. Her breasts can be tied to resemble artillery shells. Her blood–pumped vulva can be tickled with the knots, or toys can be fixed in place to provide lengthy stimulation. If it’s the inclination of shame and humiliation she enjoys, I can immobilize and spread her open, exposed. If it’s predicament, I can strap her into positions that bring dilemma. If it’s the pleasure of pain she craves, I can flay her with the rope, or suspend her to make patches of her skin hypersensitive for further sadism, and/or adding tight constriction. Even if she just wants to look sexy, I can build pretty patterns to accentuate her bodily features. No other tool in the BDSM armory has so much potential. This is phenomenally important. It remains just a tool. The best moments aren’t even in the tying. It’s the untying, when she’s in her zone. She is in her special head-space and/or is fully aroused, and/or is fully sensitized. It is when she’s conditioned: emotionally, psychologically and physically. When she’s willingly given herself,  rope bondage is like foreplay. It gives time to develop and amplify, bringing my partner into contextual space, adding gradual layers of excitement.

What is your favorite knot/tie/harness (etc.)?

I don’t have a favorite knot. The rope is peripheral. I’ve been tying erotically for more than 30 years. So, I don’t ever plan what will happen. I sense the direction my partner wishes to go, and she ties herself with my hands. I have knots, hitches, harnesses and suspensions that are particular to me that I’ve developed over the years, but I don’t really think about them when I’m tying. They aren’t the focus of my attention. She is.

How do you deal with aftercare and what advice can you give to those interested in rope play?

Aftercare is phenomenally important. It shouldn’t be without solid preparation and immediate debrief after the active part of a session. The more one can understand our partner by deep conversation, communication and comprehension, the better chance we must drive up to limits without crossing over them. The aims, goals, and desires, as well as the hard limits and taboos of our partners, are critical. That’s more important than any knot or structure. The better we can take them to a fine area between not enough and too much, the greater their enjoyment. After a recovery phase, allowing the partner to enjoy the special space they’ve arrived at, immediate debriefing helps understand what just happened. The better we get at these factors, the less chance we’ll have to administer any aftercare. Being a top comes with a huge weight of responsibility, a solid moral compass, empathy, and understanding, etc. Some just don’t have these elements within them, and they’re not things one can learn, because they remain parts of our basic psychological make-up.

Describe your perfect rope play scenario.

My perfect rope play scenario is when the lady I’m working with is totally satisfied.

 

 

So…

What have we learned from all this?

Rope play is an art-form and obviously popular in BDSM/the kink community. It’s a thrill for both the person getting tied up and for the person who is doing the tying. Of course, safety and aftercare are essential. My Domme, Miss Melissa, loves rope. She loves tying me up intricate ways. We have a large trunk with tons of rope in it, among other kinky things. If you have never been tied up or you never tied someone up, I suggest you try it. If you are unable to take a class, there are many instructional videos on the internet to teach about technique and safety. I must go, my friends. Miss Melissa wants to tie me to the bedpost. I have a feeling I will not be going anywhere for a while.

 

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