Tag: bdsm

Some Dos & Don’ts of Approaching People In The Kink Community

By Nicholas Tanek

Kinky people are human and humans make mistakes. There is an etiquette in the kink community, like anywhere else. Although I consider myself a switch, I am very much into Femdom. I have made some truly dumb mistakes approaching Dommes. I have grown quite a bit since then and learned some valuable lessons. Of course, I’m still learning and growing as a kinky person.  In general, it’s important to have etiquette when dealing with anyone, even in the kink community.

So, I asked some of my friends in the kink community three questions and I hope their answers may help others.

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Being Kinky Behind Your Vanilla Partner’s Back

By Nicholas Tanek

I was once in a miserable marriage with a woman named Alison.  The kinkiest thing we did was me tying her up while she wore lingerie and I used a vibrator on her. There was this one time I put a dog leash on her and fucked her from behind while she yelled, “I’m your slut! Yes! Fuck your little slut!” That was fun, but I also had femdom fantasies that I wanted to explore. When I was married, I never expected my ex-wife to understand my interest in forced crossdressing, male chastity, pegging, and femdom.

These days, I am a part of the kink community and live a kinky lifestyle. I’m proud of that. While I can be a switch, the femdom dynamic is strong. I spent many years trapped in a relationship that was unsatisfying and uncomfortable. I refuse to live that way, and I know that I am not alone. So, I asked some of my kinky friends to share some of their experiences of doing kinky things behind their vanilla partner’s back. I asked three questions in the hope that you, dear reader, may not feel so alone if you are in the same situation.

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WANT TO EXPLORE FEMDOM? Your Kinky Friends can help!

 

 By Nicholas Tanek

 

Femdom

  1. Or: femdomme / domme / female dom / female dominant, a woman who enjoys the dominating role in BDSM scenes.
  2. A BDSM scene controlled by a woman.

 

A Femdom relationship is not always the easiest thing to start. In the kink community, the number of men who enjoy Femdom outnumber the women who participate in it. It can be a lonely world out there for a man who is interested in Femdom, male chastity, cuckolding, and forced crossdressing.

I wanted to write this article to help both men and women who are interested in getting into Femdom relationships (professional or personal). So I asked a bunch of my kinky friends three questions. Here are their answers.

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TOO KINKY? Tales of Being Too Kinky & Being Out-Kinked.

By Nicholas Tanek

I am a kinky person and I am proud of it. I’m so proud of it, I was a guest on an episode of the ProudToBeKinky podcast. I even wrote a book about the kink community titled Your Kinky Friends. Most of my family and my vanilla friends are shocked (or at least surprised) by the kinky experiences that I talk about. At the same time, these experiences have only scratched the surface of the kink community. Basically, I am a switch, but I do enjoy Femdom, forced crossdressing, and male chastity. Some women are freaked out by that. At the same time, I have met some women who are into some hardcore kink that scares me. Just when I think I’m kinky, cool, and in the scene, I talk to someone who makes me realize there is a whole world of kink out there I know nothing about.
So I asked my kinky friends two simple questions about both sides of the kink spectrum. Here are their answers.

Continue reading TOO KINKY? Tales of Being Too Kinky & Being Out-Kinked.